Sunday, May 3, 2009

Flash Fiction*: One Breath

The Middle-Aged Woman sent me an email today with the Subject line:

Are you in? I'm in.**
And a link to Jeanne's Fiction Friday Challenge at The Raisin Chronicles.

The challenge was/is: to write a piece of "flash fiction" - a short story of 100 words or less that begins with the phrase -

"The room was silent except for...."
Never one to back down from a challenge by two women (especially when one is my wife), I submitted my story Saturday evening.*** I'm also never one to miss a two-for-one posting opportunity; so my post today consists, in large part, of my flash fiction submission entitled:

One Breath

The room was silent except for the distant hum of a fan. He lay still, his breathing hushed. He felt alone – although she was close enough to touch him.

Then she reached out and grasped his arm, a gentle tug. Relief swept over him. He turned to her and covered her mouth with his own; his arms encircled her and drew her close. She took a sharp breath as she felt his lips on her throat, his hand at the small of her back. Now they breathed with one breath.

“I want you. Do you want me?” he asked.

“Yes.”
==============================

Hope you enjoyed my story.


Take care.


* not "flasher" fiction (despite what you may think after reading my story)
** Of course, I'm always wanting to be in
*** a day late - but not a word short.

6 comments:

Middle Aged Woman said...

Something seems...familiar about this story. Can't put my finger on it. Mine will be up tomorrow. My story, I mean.

Jim Styro said...

MAW: I guess I do have some vague recollection. My memory's not what it used to be, I guess (although other parts seem to be doing OK).
I'd be much obliged if you'd help refresh my memory.

Jeanne said...

Great story! Of course, I'm always a sucker for two kids in love....

Jim Styro said...

Jeanne: Thanks very much for the kind words. When I first started thinking about what I might write (and I was unclear on the specifics of the challenge), I had imagined telling a very different kind of story. But when I decided that it made sense to move the story indoors - and I decided on the sound I wanted in the story - well, nature just seemed to take its course (as they say).

Captain Dumbass said...

You're really going to scar the kids if you start putting this stuff out there for everybody to read.

Jim Styro said...

Cap'n: It's just fiction, dude. (Stuff like that almost never happens to me.) And it's not very explicit either. I didn't even use the word "boobs".

Besides my daughter's engaged and on the pill. And my son is far more into Internet porn than I would care to acknowledge publicly. Need I say more?